A leader in network marketing doesn’t have to fit into the tables

For most of my youth, until about the age of 28, people laughed at me for being skinny. I heard the same things again and again:

• Do they even feed him at home?
• The wind will blow you over.
• Arms like toothpicks.

I felt fine in my own body. I just didn’t fit into the tables. Into their tables, in their eyes…

I’m not angry with anyone. They couldn’t know what they didn’t know yet. For example, that at 44 I would be digging the foundations for the seating area my wife Lenka wanted so much.

The space was so narrow that I fitted into it just right. I didn’t have to widen the foundations to squeeze myself in.

Why am I writing this on a blog about network marketing? Because a leader in network marketing has their own tables too. And plenty of capable people never start a business simply because they don’t fit into them.

What should a leader in network marketing be like?

A leader in network marketing should be someone people follow of their own free will because they trust them. They don’t need a title, a stage or an expensive car. They need their words and their actions to say the same thing.

Network marketing is a way of selling in which a company sells products through a network of independent partners. Each of them can sell and build their own team at the same time. The leader is the one who holds the team together, teaches and shows the way.

In practice that means three ordinary things. Keep your word. Have time for people when they need it. And tell the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Why do people try to fit into the “MLM tables”?

People try to fit into the MLM tables because they often see only one picture of success: a loud speaker, photos from the beach and endless enthusiasm. If you aren’t like that, it’s easy to tell yourself network marketing isn’t for you.

I understand. That picture is everywhere. But it is only one table among many, and the least important one.

These are the tables someone will most often slide in front of you:

• You have to be an extrovert and talk to everyone.
• You have to show off luxury so that people trust you.
• You have to be enthusiastic all the time or it won’t work.
• You have to have a rehearsed line for every objection.

None of that is a requirement. Some of it will actually put people off.

Which qualities of an MLM leader really matter?

In network marketing the qualities that matter most are the ones you can’t see at first glance: honesty, patience, the ability to listen and the willingness to teach others. They are what hold a team together even when things aren’t going well.

What is said about leaders in network marketing and what I think really matters

The table says	What really matters
They must be loud	They must know how to listen. People stay with someone who understands them.
They must show off luxury	They must be trustworthy. Luxury in photos attracts attention, but not trust.
They must be enthusiastic all the time	They must be steady. A team needs calm, especially when things aren’t going well.
They must have an answer to everything	They must be able to say “I don’t know, I’ll find out”.
They must have a huge circle of acquaintances	They must be able to build relationships gradually and without pressure.

If you look at the right-hand column, you will probably find that you can already do a lot of it.

Can an introvert be a good leader in network marketing?

An introvert can be a very good leader in network marketing, because introverts usually know how to listen, think before they speak and build deeper relationships with fewer people. A team built on trust often lasts longer than a team built on loud energy.

An introvert simply needs a different style. Fewer big events, more one-to-one conversations. Less performing, more attention.

I’m not saying extroverts do it wrong. I’m only saying that the table “a leader is the loudest person in the room” doesn’t hold.

How do you lead a team when you aren’t a typical motivator?

You can lead a team without motivational speeches if you build on clear steps, personal contact and your own example. People watch what you do more than what you say.

1. Be visible in your work, not in poses. Show how you really work, including the days when things aren’t going well.
2. Ask more than you talk. Everyone in the team has a different reason for being here. Find out what it is.
3. Give simple steps. One clear task a week does more than ten motivational quotes.
4. Tell the truth. Network marketing is a business and results are not guaranteed. People appreciate hearing that from you.
5. Be reachable. A leader who answers a message means more than a leader who performs on a stage.

I’m looking for exactly this kind of people. A few leaders who want to build with me and don’t have to squeeze into other people’s tables to do it. I describe how I build a team in the article Building a team in MLM: why the foundations nobody sees decide everything.

Frequently asked questions

Does a leader in network marketing have to be an extrovert?

A leader in network marketing doesn’t have to be an extrovert. It is more important to listen, keep your word and help people in the team take their next step. Introverts often build smaller but stronger relationships, and that is a big advantage for a long-term team.

Do I need experience of leading people?

Experience of leading people helps, but it isn’t a requirement. Leading can be learned if you are willing to listen, admit a mistake and do what you ask of others. A person learns the most by starting and accepting advice.

Do I have to show success on social media?

You don’t have to show luxury or success on social media. People trust real life and honest work more than photos from expensive places. Share what you do and why, and leave out promises you can’t keep.

How do I know I have what it takes to be a leader?

You can tell you have what it takes to be a leader by whether you enjoy helping others grow and whether you stay the course when things aren’t going well. If people already come to you for advice, that is a good sign.

How much time does leading a team take?

How much time leading a team takes depends on the size of the team and how fast you want to grow. At the start a few hours a week for conversations and support is enough. Regularity matters more than the amount of time.

What not fitting into the tables is good for

For me it came in handy in a hole in the garden. I didn’t have to redo the plans.

It’s the same in network marketing. If you don’t adapt to other people’s tables, you don’t have to remake yourself later.

If this spoke to you and you want to see what I’m building with, arrange a private presentation. Calmly and with no obligation.

Tom